I want every last one of my scary questions answered. The thought of losing my mother hurts my heart and soul so bad. To know that all I can do is just live for today and be grateful for it is bullshit. I want her here forever. I don't want to live without her. She is the most amazing person to ever live on this dumb us earth. My goal every day is to make her happy. As she makes me and my brother's happy every second of everyday. The love she gives us is unexplainable. I'm the luckiest girl in the world to have her. Today we have a conversation about what I would name my first born girl when that time comes and she said if I'm dead name her after me, and if I'm still here I'll pick out a name for you. That broke the sh-t outta my heart. To just for 1 sec think she will be gone one dumb ass day. But that's life the b-tch that she is. We are all dieing to live yet living to f-cking die. I just died her hair as we listen to justin nozuka. ....
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